Merry Christmas

I love Christmas. I love seeing everyone mostly. It’s an excuse to just pop in and see someone or a plan is in place to make sure you see the one’s who are most important in your life. It starts Christmas Eve for me and usually goes right until New Years Eve when Dick Clark’s balls drop. Or now more appropriately Ryan Seacrest’s balls descend.

Most of you won’t receive a card from us this year and I will tell you that it’s one part procrastination, one part flu, and one part because Shoppers Drugmart sucks ass. Let me explain…

You see I captured this really great picture of Lexi putting on her Santa hat and thought it would be perfect to stuff into envelopes and send to all of our friends. Ever since that one year Ratte gave me shit for sending out a card with just Vegas on it I make sure now that at least one of us are on it too. Anyway I do some editing at home and then bring this picture to Shoppers to make a card, just like I do every year. Thing I didn’t know about this year was that they changed their machines this year. Instead of having like 30 different Christmas card options there is 6, and they all suck pretty bad. In reality there were only 3 options that would work with the image I wanted to use anyway so I was limited once again. BRUUUUUUUUUTAL. I finally settle on the least crappy template and spend the next 20 mins trying to type out my name and phone number. Stupid thing won’t except “Peever” as a first name, arg, I start again.

The lady tells me that it will be about 20 mins so I hang out in the store and wait. I almost bought some pens for school, good thing I didn’t. After about 10 mins she finds me in the store and shows me 1 of my 40 prints. It’s a great picture of Lexi with a big heading that reads “Merry Christmas – YOUR TEXT HERE”. I forgot to customize my message. Luckily they caught it in time and it was just a matter of going back in and re-doing it. I get back to the terminal, pick the least crappy template and when I go to enter my message it won’t let me. I politely call the lady over and she tries a couple of times and she can’t edit it either. We even go through the tedious process on another couple machines and it doesn’t work on them either. BLAST.

“It must just be that template…” she says. “This one’s nice…”

By this time I am completely livid and out of options. In one last ditch effort to lash out I do the unthinkable and pull out my flash drive with authority before the machine tells me it’s safe to do so. What a complete waste of time that was and it’s too bad too because the old system they had there was stellar. I could go in Christmas Eve and still pound those suckers out to everyone.

As a result I didn’t do cards this year. We didn’t do cards I should say. Next year everyone will be getting a Christmas card with this years picture of Lexi in a Santa hat. Something you are all looking forward to I am sure. If you sent us a card this year we do appreciate the sentiment and we love you and your attention to these matters. Instead of reciprocating card for card I hope to shake your hand or hug your wife somewhere over the next couple of days.

Merry Christmas Everyone (screw you Shoppers Drug Mart).